Hey. Ja-ja-ja-jaded.

The word 'jaded' defined by the merriam-webster dictionary means "made dull, apathetic, or cynical by experience or by surfeit."

Recently I've been hanging out with a sophomore who is a 3 week old Christian. She is a wonderful girl, full of life and love. She is excited about all things God. She loves going to church and learning from the preacher. She sat there and listened, hung onto the preacher's every word as he talked about overcoming the world through Jesus. After service she said she thinks it all "soaked in." I gave her her first Bible. She just sat there looking at it, not knowing where to start. We put a bookmark in John. She made sure it stayed in its place, occasionally opening the book up to that very spot. She said that when she got home she was going to put tabs on the different books to make it easier to find them and then she was going to start reading it. She said that since becoming a Christian, she is just happy. She said the other week when she came into the church service, a weight was lifted off of her.

Its been so long since I've been around new believers. They are full of life and excitement, anticipation and hunger. As she was sharing these things with me, all I could come to think of was, "those feelings aren't going to last, just wait...you'll see..." Then as the thought passed through my mind, I stopped. When did I become that Christian? When did I become the one that was so jaded by Christianity and so cynical about the things of God? There is some right in the fact that those "feelings" aren't going to last forever, that there is something about being a mature Christian that goes deeper than just the "feelings" of life. But there is something truly wrong with my thinking. I stopped living/believing in God for the pure joy and happiness that only He can bring. These "feelings" should be a part of a Christian's life. As I started thinking about it more I became jealous of her awe and inspiration for the Lord. Oh, to dream the impossible with God and to be so awakened to the reality of life, true life, abundant life, that it wells up inside you...

My prayer is that I become alive on the inside, and that I am able to overcome the idea that Christianity being lived out, is a mundane act. I think that if I really understood the gospel, life would be anything but mundane.

Awaken the Gospel in me Lord Jesus.