Christmas Begins

Its the time of the year where starbucks puts out their famous Christmas coffee treats, there are sales galore trying to get you to spend money on things you don't really need, christmas music is playing non-stop, and decorations of all kinds go up around the town and in your own home. I've been putting off Christmas decorating this year. For some reason I just haven't had the desire to do it. Well, it all started 2 days ago... we have group here on Thursday nights. A bunch of the people who come don't put christmas things up in their homes. So, I thought I would grace them with holiday cheer, bite the bullet, and decorate my house. I pulled out the 2 year old pre-lit tree, assembled it, plugged it in and only half of the lights on the thing work. I think, no biggie, I can just go get a light tester, you know the kind you find at Home Depot or Wal-Mart in the states. So out I go. 3 stores, many unhelpful store employees, 2 lattes, buckets of rain (which means wet clothes for the girl who forgot her umbrella), and a bad mood later, no light tester. I had other things that needed to get done that day, so I put my christmas decorating endeavors on hold for the night. "I'll figure this out tomorrow," I thought. The next day rolls around. I decide over the night that I am going to change my game plan. I go back to the one store with the intent of buying one strand of lights. It should be an easy fix, right? To the light section I go. I look around and see no single strand lights. Bummer. Back home, I decide I need to get my house in order. I have 4 hours before people come over. There are boxes filled with christmas decorations and ornaments everywhere not to mention the many loads of laundry sitting on the couch needing to be folded and put away. I need to clean! I start with the table and move my way through the house decorating and cleaning as I go. The stockings are hung, candles and nutcrackers are placed around. Everything is in its right place, but the magic seems to be missing because my sad tree isn't decorated and only half of the lights turn on. I thought all hope was lost. Non-the-less friends start arriving. The first friend to come is George (we'll call him this for privacy). George is a cool, level-headed dude. I saw him at the store earlier in the day on my trek to get lights. He asked why I was all the way up town and I told him my sad story. Without saying anything, he gets up, and starts inspecting every little light on my tree. Then I remember, George is a bomb technician. I say, "oh yea, you have to work with wires and things of the sort all the time." He says, " yea, I just built a bomb today." WHAT??!! Crazy man. He goes on looking and changing little lights until group starts. Another friends who works on the maintenance of hundreds or millions of dollars worth of aircraft comes in and starts helping. Its like I have the dream team working to fix my tree. Amazing. Long story short, they unwind a whole strand of lights from the tree (which is a major feat in itself)and inspect all of the lights. But still, the thing won't light up. I thought they were going to take the lights home with them so they wouldn't have to admit defeat. But the end result is that there is nothing to be done about these lights. They cannot be fixed. I paid the gentlemen for their time with as many fresh baked chocolate chip cookies they could eat and some for the road. I felt super blessed that they would try so hard and take their time to work on something so trivial as my tree lights. I am grateful for them. What about the lights you ask. Another friend is going to give me a strand she has in storage. I am grateful for friends that take time to care about us in even the smallest of ways. I just pray that I am a good steward of the friends Jesus places in my life. Sometimes I wish there were other friends around, maybe ones that I am more comfortable with or get along with better. But Jesus knows just who I need now. Here is what the house looks like so far.

Sad Christmas tree.

The nutcrackers are Joel's. Use shawls (pashminas) and ribbons to spruce up any spot.

I made these last year as well. Its SUPER easy! Take a box glass vase, fill it with ornaments and put satin ribbon around it. I fastened the ribbon with double sided sticky tape. Then make a bow to stick on top.

sisters

One of my sisters came to visit me. We had a great time. I miss her already.

Being Known

I just want to say that I love the blog world. I love reading other people's thoughts and opinions from the safe comfort of my home...I mean, today I've read 4 people's blogs, people I don't know or have never met. And though I've never met them, and probably never will, I find myself agreeing with their heart, crying at the aches and pains they feel in their life, and rejoicing with them in their joy. The amazing creation of technology; you can know someone without really knowing them. In the same vain, its kind of a sad thing. You can go through life feeling really close to people, but really know no one and be known by no one. Sad. To quote a friend, its "relational masturbation," (thank you Aaron), a quick fix to our need for community, love, and friendship. So sad. The reality is that most of us are too afraid take the step of friendship into real vulnerability, where we know someone and ARE TRULY KNOWN. That's the real kicker, the being known part. We have no problem knowing others, but when we are asked to divulge information about the secrets of our heart, we shirk back in fear. I have no answer to this problem. I, along with everyone out there, have issues with the being known part of a friendship. I ask the Lord to help me, step by step, in each conversation, to not shy back from who he's made me to be, even if that means heartache and pain for me in the end. I want to be someone who is known by people and by the Lord.

A Man who Trusts in the Lord

Jeremiah 7:8-9. "Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord and whose trust is the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit."


Laura and Chey- Sisters- Thank you for showing me how to be a woman who loves Jesus as her only passion. I will forever look up to you two as spiritual leaders in my life. And secretly I do want to be like you when I grow up.





Audrey, Anna, Maria, Rachel, and Kim- Little Girls- Thank you for journeying with me and experiencing Jesus with me. You guys helped me form a foundation of the basics in Christianity...praying, reading the word, etc. I will forever remember all of the times we've had together at the girls' nights. You guys are the best! (Sorry Kim, I don't have a recent pic. of us. You're still loved though!!)




Hope and Brittany- I don't know what I would have done or where I'd be now if you guys hadn't come into my life in college. You guys are true friends through and through; always ready to give of yourself for others. Thank you for the many times that you helped me delay doing school work for a doughnut/gil. night. You both are amazing. Thank you for showing me how to love Jesus more.



Mazvita- You get your own category because you are unique. Thank you for talking with me all of those late nights. Thank you for sharing your heart with me and being vulnerable with me. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and discernment. Thank you for letting me watch you grow in the Lord, in the painful times and the happy times. (I am so excited for you and Ben!)


Laura. Chey. Audrey. Anna. Maria. Rachel. Kim. Chelsea. Hope. Brittany. Mazvita. Thank you for being godly women of faith. Thank you for trusting in the Lord with seemingly unwavering faith. Thank you for loving Jesus and depending on Him even through the toughest of situations. Thank you for always trusting that the Lord has a plan and purpose for your life, and for my life. Thank you for clinging to Jesus and hiding yourself in Him. You've left a mark on my life forever. You are true friends. Thank you for being selfless and giving yourself fully to God and to people. Thank you for sharing your lives with me. You are all such amazing, beautiful women.

Friendship

Whenever I hear anything said about friendship these days I am all ears and usually struck to the core wondering and examining my our heart, life, motives as to whether I am truly a good friend. Let me back up to why I am blogging about this. Yesterday's sermon talked a little about authentic friendship. The definition of a friend that was given was this:

"A trustworthy peer with whom we mutually choose to lovingly live with by seeking unique access and service for God's glory and our mutual good."- Mark Driscoll

Our pastor pointed out the words, "peer", "mutually choose", "live with", and "God's glory". The word that gets me the most every time is the "live with". I know that it doesn't seem like it should be interesting or even difficult, but its the one that trips me up the most. He said that living with doesn't mean cohabitation, but that it simply means a co-sharing of activities, emotions, hearts, etc. This means that the friend shares their "junk" with me and I with them. This means that there is risk involved. This means that there is risk because of the fact that you have to trust this person with your heart, thoughts, and even sin, and KNOW that they will care for it as you care for theirs. Its always hardest for me to trust my heart, to be completely vulnerable and let people/ a person into that part of my life. This is the challenge that hits me every time I hear anything about friendship, "Am I doing my part in being a friend? Am I letting that person into my heart, into my sin and letting them help me through it? Do I trust the Lord enough to guard my heart though I share it with others?" Sometimes, most times, my answer is no.